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Why The A$$ Rag?
#46
[quote name='Mike Mlodzik' post='172514' date='Oct 28 2007, 08:52 PM']
Quote:I boiled it twice, and let it dry, but the snot just hardened and stayed on. How do you clean it exactly?





Think of different techniques ...

and the different actions needed to accomplish them ...

examples:



...rinsing ...



...washing ...



...sounds like you were 'cooking' ...



Don't forget ... you need to remove the chunks.



The 'snap the towel' method ... used when dry. (Remember the video? <img src='http://www.hoodswoods.net/IVB/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/blink.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':blink:' /> )



The actual washing, agitation method.



The ................



Mike <img src='http://www.hoodswoods.net/IVB/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/wink.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='Wink' />

[/quote]



Or use TP <img src='http://www.hoodswoods.net/IVB/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/tongue.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='Tongue' />
#47
Thanks Mike...what video was that on? I do not remember seeing that.



...I did not even think about washing it like normal clothes...(Where's my hub-cap?)



Mako
"The first law...should be nailed on every cot. The first law. This world's job is to take everything from you. Yours is not to let it."   -Woman and Scarecrow

If I never had to use my intellect again, I wouldn't mind.

A real survival board game!?
sixmilehomestead.com
#48
Quote:...what video was that on?



That was meant as a joke <img src='http://www.hoodswoods.net/IVB/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/wink.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='Wink' />

Sorry.



Here is a link to past scatological musings:



[url="http://hoodswoods.net/IVB/index.php?s=&showtopic=4265&view=findpost&p=35465"]http://hoodswoods.net/IVB/index.php?s=&amp...ost&p=35465[/url]



Mike
#49
Does the book "How to shit in the woods" cover the Ass Rag?
Message of Insight and Unity 

We go into the wilderness to fulfill our hearts and empty our minds of life's garbage.
The gear we leave behind and the challenges we encounter, 
Are methods we use to cleanse our spirits.
Of Survivalists and Bushcrafters, Primitive Technologists too, we are one.........

It is the wilderness within, we strive for first and always.
Not everyone can have a cabin in the mountains.
The thread that connects us, is fine like silk and strong as steel.
Together, the song of the wilderness is the song we sing!

"And can I say something else?"
Bushcrafting is "doing what you want to do." 
Survival is "doing what you have to do"
Primitive Technology is about all of the above........

By TNRR aka "Survival Sully"
#50
Get an extra cap that fits on one of your “disposable” or collapsible water bottles - heat up the tip of a needle with your lighter and poke a hole in the cap - After a crap and a wipe with a stick, rock, or leaf litter, give yourself a little squirt from your hiker bidet. But whatever you do, don't go to : [url="http://www.poopreport.com/"]http://www.poopreport.com/[/url]



The Roman public toilets had natural sponges on sticks which were stored in white vinegar, not salt water. Some old Army vids of field sanitation and other interesting and graphic topics can be found here: [url="http://www.operationalmedicine.org/Videos.htm"]http://www.operationalmedicine.org/Videos.htm[/url] (Environmental Issues)
#51
[quote name='Swampman' post='172166' date='Oct 27 2007, 07:34 AM']The rag can be rinsed in the creek and will have no smell. Hang it up in camp or on your pack and it will dry in no time.



Personally a 10 pack of towelettes last me for a pretty long time (days)and that's what I use. They are usually sold near the register at Walmart. Make sure that are for personal hygiene and not the kind with bleach for wiping around the sinkWink



Some folks actually trim the hair from around their butt hole. I haven't "progressed" that far myself.[/quote]



Ha! very funny. Just make sure the readers know your joking about washing your feces into streams.



I simply use forest duff and leaves. In my area in the winter the beech tree saplings tend to hold their dry dead leaves, for this reason I call it the "toilet paper tree" and collect them for future use as I snowshoe along.
Earth - love it or leave it.



SurvivalTopics.com

FireSteel.com
#52
ya know the best piece of ass i've had all year was when my finger went throu those grape leaves, oh shit, wait wrong subject.



i like the bird meathod my 1st ex-wife was sooooooooooooo big she had ta use big bird.



i think i'll just stick(no pun intended) to tp





tryker
Tryker

A man who brags about how smart he is, wouldn't if he was.

If the golden rule says, ''Silence Is Golden'' Why is duck tape silver???








#53
This weekend I went out in my front yard and tried (to the shocked looks of my neighbors) to drag my ass across the grass like my Lab does. Alas, I'm not limber enough for that method, so back to TP I guess....
"Some people think I'm over-prepared, paranoid...maybe even a little crazy. But THEY never met any Precambrian lifeforms, did they?"

- Burt Gummer (Tremors 2)



"The American people will never knowingly adopt socialism. But, under the name of 'liberalism,' they will adopt every fragment of the socialist program, until one day America will be a socialist nation, without knowing how it happened."

- Norman Thomas, U.S. Socialist Party presidential candidate 1940, 1944 and 1948



"Am fear nach gleidh na h-airm san t-sith, cha bhi iad aige 'n am a' chogaidh."

- Scottish proverb (He that keeps not his arms in time of peace will have none in time of war)



"It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent that survives. It is the one that is the most adaptable to change."

- Charles Darwin
#54
[quote name='Juddzilla' post='172662' date='Oct 29 2007, 09:07 AM']This weekend I went out in my front yard and tried (to the shocked looks of my neighbors) to drag my ass across the grass like my Lab does. Alas, I'm not limber enough for that method, so back to TP I guess....[/quote]



The design of a human posterior is not ideal for the grass drag technique. We are a bit too cheeky due to our upright posture. There is a modification that works well.... short trees. Face the tree, hand over groin and walk forward slowly. The tree will bend to fit the anatomical terrain and the tip will clear any final smudge in a final lash as it resumes it's natural position.



Ron
Hind sight is an exact science until historians or politicians get involved.



Nothing is so simple that it can't be misunderstood.



I have regular bowel movements, I just wish they were voluntary...



My dad started walking five miles a day when he was 60. Now he's 91, and we don't know where he is.



Understand?
#55
Oh Ron OUCH <img src='http://www.hoodswoods.net/IVB/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/rolleyes.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='Rolleyes' />



Thanks for the laugh friend



Kid
Live with honor, ride with truth.  Be friendly to others.  But always carry a gun on your side and a knife in your boot because there are those that do not feel the same as this.


#56
Gee, thanks Ron! I tried wrapping up my morning constitutional on my neighbors young tree, just as you described. Unfortunately it was a lemon tree! My asshole hasn't hurt this bad since that night I passed out in San Francisco doing tequila shooters at a topless club. When I came to, my first words were, "Damn I gotta stop drinking Cuervo...it makes my ass hurt!"
"Some people think I'm over-prepared, paranoid...maybe even a little crazy. But THEY never met any Precambrian lifeforms, did they?"

- Burt Gummer (Tremors 2)



"The American people will never knowingly adopt socialism. But, under the name of 'liberalism,' they will adopt every fragment of the socialist program, until one day America will be a socialist nation, without knowing how it happened."

- Norman Thomas, U.S. Socialist Party presidential candidate 1940, 1944 and 1948



"Am fear nach gleidh na h-airm san t-sith, cha bhi iad aige 'n am a' chogaidh."

- Scottish proverb (He that keeps not his arms in time of peace will have none in time of war)



"It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent that survives. It is the one that is the most adaptable to change."

- Charles Darwin
#57
I prefer T.P., but I do carry a couple of cheap bandannas in case I run out.



Something I haven't seen any T.P. users mention...I burn my tp when I've finished with "the paperwork". It goes into the small cat hole with the "pumpernickel loaf" and I light it with a small bic lighter I keep in the zipok bag with the TP. When it's burned almost completely, the whole shebang gets covered over with dirt. You have to be careful on windy days and in dry conditions, though.
Hoodlum formerly known as "molawns"



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"An investment in knowledge pays the best interest."



"Rebellion against tyrants is obedience to God."



"Tell me and I forget. Teach me and I remember. Involve me and I learn."



~Benjamin Franklin





"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."



~ Mark Twain





"What lies behind us, and what lies before us are small matters compared to what lies within us."



~Ralph Waldo Emerson
#58
I believe Ron neglected to mention the importance of direction and velocity when using the "short tree-crap catapult" method.



Unless one wishes to decorate their campsite in a Jackson Pollockesque smattering of feces, it is usually in your best interest to walk towards your own campsite, whilst protecting the family jewels, when using the crap catapult method of bum cleaning.



Impress your neighbors by showing them your bare arse and and picking extra springy saplings.



Have contests for distance.



Set up targets.



See who has the tightest "choke" pattern.



The list is endless....
I Hear Voices.....And They Don't Like You.



"Further, I propose that this "Moment of Misery" be hence-to-forth be referred to as "Moment of Misery for Misanthropic Yammering", or "MOMMY"!" ~ DDennis2



(what an effing moron. - i feel such pity now for his lovely wife and intelligent children - and maybe even for his food-quality dawg, nick-named "Spicy" sez i.)
#59
[quote name='MISANTHROPE' post='172748' date='Oct 29 2007, 11:54 AM']I believe Ron neglected to mention the importance of direction and velocity when using the "short tree-crap catapult" method.



Unless one wishes to decorate their campsite in a Jackson Pollockesque smattering of feces, it is usually in your best interest to walk towards your own campsite, whilst protecting the family jewels, when using the crap catapult method of bum cleaning.



Impress your neighbors by showing them your bare arse and and picking extra springy saplings.



Have contests for distance.



Set up targets.



See who has the tightest "choke" pattern.



The list is endless....[/quote]



dang thrope, beat me to it. It does make a comical way of decorating your buddys tent thought. kinda like those splatter "artists"



one thing I failed to mention, while i use tp, i have gone a little sheryl crow with my wiping style. i now use only one piece in an attempt to save the environment one square of charmin at a time. method is as follows:

(this is not for the weak stomached)

1. fold single peace of tp in quarters.

2. at folded corner tear off the corner (small piece approx 1/2 cm radius)

3. save the torn off corner

4. unfold tp and insert left index finger into hole.

5. proceed to clean your exit hole using your finger

6. now this is the important part: you will notice that after your finger has effectively squeegied your anus it will have some schrapnel attached. grab the tp and pull off your finger, cleaning the finger as you remove the square

7. the most important thing: in an attempt to keep your camp cooking clean dont forget to clean under your fingernail with the little corner you pulled off first, else when you pick a booger thinking noone is watching, you will certainly smell your feces for days to come.
official westside pirate...be jealous...and afraid.
#60
this thread is fucking hilarious, i cant stop laughing.
`But I don't want to go among mad people,' Alice remarked.

`Oh, you can't help that,' said the Cat: `we're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad.'

`How do you know I'm mad?' said Alice.

`You must be,' said the Cat,

`or you wouldn't have come here.'


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